Nostalgic Noel

Not yet quite motivated to deck our halls,
Hubby dear, determined to inspire,
Bearing boxes and bags from their basement bunks
Eagerly anticipating my enthusiasm to acquire.

Outdoor garland and glimmer begged bedecking
When Indian summer came mid-November.
Gratefully foregoing frozen fingers and toes,
A random rarity…one we’ll remember.

Sentimentally sorting through seasonal stuff,
Ill-prepared for this sudden eruption,
Unpacking the reindeer Daddy made long ago,
Found me flooded with tearful emotion.

Twice taken from those who loved him so dearly,
Alzheimer’s ~ a tragic thief ~
September 15th heaven heralded him home
Deep sadness blending bittersweet relief.

Albeit morose, life is meant to be lived,
Though death changes you…one cannot deny,
We go back to work, birthdays, weddings, and such
Regular routine ~ refreshment on which to rely.

Leaving logic in limbo, lucidity lost,
Accompanying Wait, white-water rafting we went
With a group from our church down the lovely New River
“Class 5 rapids” ~ I had no clue what that meant.

Grasping the ropes instead of rowing as directed,
For me, Class 5 meant “Hold on for dear life!”
Poor Waitman, functioning in major “protective mode”,
Broke a rib trying to shield his scared wife.

Intending to inspire (and with remarkable success)
A challenge to our VBS kids Wait gave
Fifteen-hundred dollars given from Monday to Friday,
And his head he’d permit them to shave!

Congregating in Orlando, General Assembly in June,
The Nazarene Family’s quadrennial convention.
Good workshops and services…enjoyed seeing old friends,
But the heat and humidity, a most distressing dimension.


November now waning, Thanksgiving past
December’s “fa-la-la” now set in motion.
Parties and plans, family, fellowship and fun
Perfect pleasure, this Christmas commotion!

Overwhelmingly blessed…our 3 kids and 5 “grands”
Steph & Ashton, Sam, Jaimee and Addy...
Our Texas Five (anticipating a trip there in January)…
Holly, Justin, Zach, Alex, and Maddie.

Enjoying the home our church has provided
In the place where we’ve served for three years
Faithfully following, preaching and teaching ~
Two Buckeyes amidst Mountaineers!

Lingering a little longer in the meaningful memories
Fondly reminiscing till we meet again
Saying farewell to the days of auld lang syne,
Wishing you God’s blessing in 2010.

Daddy's Sunbeam

At 8:57 a.m. Tuesday morning, September 15, 2009, my precious Daddy was transported into the presence of Jesus on a golden ray of sunshine that unnaturally, divinely exploded through a cloudy sky in his direction. Entering the slightly opened curtain, Daddy’s Sunbeam illuminated Glory’s Side for him, while warming the saddened spirits and hurting hearts of his beloved wife, four children, one of his granddaughters, and even his Hospice nurse.

I think God and Daddy were in cahoots on this ordeal and had been bantering back and forth about the final play of the game.

“Come on, Dick, it’s time to come home!”
“I know…I’m ready.”
“Well…let’s do it!”
“Um…..”
“Why the hesitation? You afraid?”
“Oh, no! Not at all! It’s just…you know….Marge.”
“I understand. This will be hard on her. I know. I watched My Son die.”
“So…can’t You do something?!”

God chuckles! At this point, Mom announces to no one in particular, “I need to go to the bathroom.” God and Daddy crack up!

“How appropriate!” Daddy says to God with a wink in his eye and a smirk on his face!
“I know!” God echoes. “I thought you’d get a kick outa that!”

Only momentarily does Daddy hesitate as he mentally glances around the room, realizing at this moment he is going to teach us kids another life lesson or two, while proving once again how much he truly loves our mother.

His focus on us rapidly dims and he knows this is a holy moment. His loud, raspy breaths immediately quiet and we all know it too.

“Hurry, get mom!”
“It’s okay Daddy…it’s time to go! We love you!”
“Should I call for a nurse?”
“Yes…push the button.”
“Mom…HURRY!”

Despite the holiness of the moment, God and Daddy are both still smirking a bit. Then Mom arrives on the scene and God announces…
“Come on, Richard!”
“I’m coming!...What the heck is THAT?!”, Daddy inquires.

God replies, “I’ve sent a sunbeam…your limo waits!”

Amidst the words of love and permission of release, it is announced… “Look at that beam of sunshine coming through this window!”

Daddy looks at God…they both smile as he hops on.
Journey’s End.

Death Changes You

When someone very close to you dies, there are changes that occur over which you have absolutely no control. Even though you long for one more conversation, one more touch, one more look into eyes where love was reciprocated, you must, in your own way, come to terms with the finality of death. It changes you in ways you didn't request. You will NEVER be the same.

But there's something about death that makes me WANT to change...to be different..to be better. My Daddy's death has stirred something within me that makes personal improvement my mandate.

I want to learn to develop thsoe qualities of his that are now so intensified in my mind. His simpleness...his great humor...his deep faith...being comfortable and content with who he was...unpretentious...secure...a "selective listener".

In his later years, Daddy occasionally wore a hearing aid and there were times when we would joke about him either NOT hearing or...pretending NOT TO hear! I like to think that he "heard" it all, but he only selectively "listened" to what was truly important.

People could say things about him either behind his back or to his face, but he didn't allow it to bother him. He KNEW who he was and he knew he WASN'T what they said.

His legacy will live on in his children both intentionally and unintentionally. I am choosing to attempt to implement those admirable qualities he had that I currently lack.

But there is much in me that just comes naturally. I AM my father's daughter. Just yesterday, I walked into my office and inadvertently made that "buzzing lips" sound that we all frequently heard from Daddy at random times throughout the day...and my eyes welled up with tears. I didn't plan to do that...it was unintentional but natural.

Every time I utter one of his many cliches, or inadvertently shiver, or buzz my lips, I will think of my Daddy. I was never the same knowing him ~ I will never be the same losing him.

Five Guys

There is a hamburger joint in Cleveland, Ohio called “Five Guys” where people stand in a long line to purchase the delectable cuisine they serve. We tried to eat there the other day but decided the line was just too long and we were too hungry. We opted for something else.

For fifty five years and one week to the day, I knew a man whose impact upon my life has changed me forever. I actually knew him before I even entered this world. He had a major part in my being here today. He taught me many things…some by words and advice…mostly by demonstration. He was a simple man, never puffed up or phony…always the same no matter who he was around. He was a “Diamond in the Rough”. He never had material wealth because he was born “good lookin’ instead of rich”! He was never famous, but his legacy is immeasurable. He gave new meaning to the word “funny” but his humor was never at the expense of anyone but himself. His work ethic was the norm for those dubbed “The Greatest Generation”. His faith, fervent. His love, deep. His life, too short. We buried him yesterday. He was my Dad.

Forty one years ago I met a guy who was the neighbor of a friend. He was really cute! He would come to some of the teen events at my church occasionally. He went with us to an amusement park one summer and we held hands in the fun house! We dated…we broke up…he went his way…I went mine. Our paths coincidentally crossed again thirty six years ago. I married him. He is still THE one who…loves me unconditionally… makes me laugh...shares my joys and sorrows…teaches me life lessons by his profound example…is wise beyond his years…a deep thinker…analyzer…discerner…generous to a fault…caring father…solid example…my lover…my best friend…my pastor…my husband.

When this great guy and I got together, I “inherited” another guy who has been amazingly influential in my life, rarely by words…always by example. He is a Gentle Giant. A World War II veteran with that “Greatest Generation” work ethic...loyal… quiet…strong…simply educated…incredibly wise…deeply spiritual. My Father-in-Law.

Then there’s this young man in whose life I have extreme personal interest. He never ceases to bring me joy. For 25 years I’ve been so busy influencing him I hardly noticed the role reversal. Oh, he’s probably not even aware of his effect on me. He is a combination of my other three guys. He is good lookin’, funny, solid, deeply spiritual, sensitive, passionate. He is my son.

I saved the best for last because without Him, the other four would be mere men. He is the One who endowed them with their endearing qualities. Early in my life I encountered this Man through my dear parents who made me aware of Him but never forced me into a relationship with Him. At my request, my mother personally introduced me to Him sometime before I was ten years old. He is both rich and good lookin’…His life, also, was too short…He loves deeply…makes me laugh…teaches me…He is strong…simple…sensitive… passionate…He is the essence of deeply spiritual. His name is Jesus.

My Five Guys…Daddy, Waitman, Dad, Sam, and Jesus. Can’t imagine where I’d be without them. My life is abundantly blessed because of them.

That's My Dad

I wrote this 6.10.2008 after visiting my Daddy in the nursing home. I wanted the workers who cared for him to know the real him...before Alzheimer's took over.

You care for a patient in waterproof britches

This 80 year old man who can keep you in stitches
Pushing his walker to help keep him stable

Several times each day from his room to the table ~
That’s my Dad.

I care for this man who worked hard all his life

Providing for us kids and his faithful wife
The 9th of 10 children – a coal miner’s son –

Richard Ray Henry…not just someone…
That’s my Dad.

You see a patient dressed in sweats and a sweater

An Alzheimer’s victim who will not get better,
Struggling with reality – comfortable in the past

Living in his yesterdays that forever last…
That’s my Dad.

I see a man on his knees tiling floors,

With precision and skill, down on all fours,
Who enlisted in the Navy without hesitation

Serving his country – America’s Greatest Generation…
That’s my Dad.

You touch his soft hands, wrinkled and spotted with years,

As you pass him his meds or calm anxious fears.
Helping wash this body that doesn’t remember how

Gently finishing your chore with a soft drying towel…
That’s my Dad.

These hands that were often blistered, calloused and bruised

From the hard work he did and the equipment he used.
Shirtless and sun burnt after mowing all day

Mom “vinegaring” his back to take the sting away…
That’s my Dad.

You hear the same questions asked a dozen times before

“Who are you?” “Where are we?” “What’s this dumb thing for?”
No more conversations – those days are through

Brief answers, repeated questions…it’s the best he can do…
That’s my Dad.

Random ramblings, muffled mutterings…now the order of the day

Eyes closed, thoughts scattered as he passes time away.
Once lucid now distant, sometimes here, sometimes not…

It all makes me wonder why this is his lot…but…
That’s my Dad.

In mellow moments of respite, as well we all should

Sanity surfaces, prayer proceeds, welcome words… “God is good.”
This faith in the Father, many years ago founded

In these twilight years evidences a soul deeply grounded…
That’s my Dad.

Please make no mistake, this family’s anchor holds fast

To the God of creation who forgives repentant pasts.
This Author of life has numbered all of our days

And our faith simply rests in His mysterious ways…

That’s our DAD.